How to Get Unstuck as an Ambitious Young Man
I’m seeing many young ambitious men who feel stuck in life.
They are highly intelligent, but this is often to their confusion, doubt, and stagnancy.
They are so overloaded with information that they cannot access emotion.
They are looking for the next step, but the place they are looking from does not hold the answer.
When you feel stuck in life, it’s because there’s an emotion stuck there too.
you can’t decide the best thing to focus on.
you can’t scale past your current revenue ceiling
you can’t connect more deeply to your partner
All of these blockages are symptoms of inner constriction, repression, and constraint.
And it’s not your fault.
For many men, it was a highly intelligent defense mechanism to cut off access to emotion to feel ‘safe’.
But now, this leads us to subconsciously believe that accessing our emotions will make us feel unsafe, or that it will hurt to feel emotion.
IF you’re a young man, when’s the last time you cried?
Here’s the thing:
Being emotionally fluid does not mean that you have huge emotional experiences all the time.
It simply means that you recognize the inherent flowing nature of sensation in your body and just let it happen without taking it personally and without restraining it.
Chances are, you don’t have big emotional experiences.
The masculine emotional body is very different from the feminine emotional body.
For a man, we take a reference point of emotionality from women, but that’s not how our emotional body works.
Men experience emotions often in more subtle ways. but we try to manage our emotions to stay near our default emotion.
Management is still control, so if we control our emotional fluidity it will create symptomatic issues in other areas of our life.
lack of intimacy
income blocks
confusion
So here’s a simple experiment that you can use to get a little more unstuck in your life this week.
Set some random alarms throughout each day this week. Pick 2-3 times and title them 10% more.
When the alarm sounds, notice what part of your body you are placing your awareness. The head, the gut, the heart… etc. (I would assert that it’s probably your head) but still become aware of this.
Now, practice the 10% more interrupt.
what would it take to bring 10% more of my awareness into my body - my heart, my gut?
Notice any sensations you are neglecting, or subtle feelings you might be avoiding.
If you need to, take 5 minutes to do a “shake-out”
allow yourself to feel what you might be avoiding.
You don’t need to know what it is, just start moving your body hence the shake-out - wiggle the toes, shake the hands, shiver the shoulder
make some noise if possible - laughter, deep breath, a big UGH.
4. Try acting, responding, and creating from the part of your body that you settle into.
Less thinking, more trust in the gut.
Less doubt, more confidence in the hands.
Notice the efficacy of decisions and actions made in this state.
I guarantee you that is you spend 10% more time in these states of welcoming sensation that you will see an uptick in clarity, confidence, and connection in relationships, career/business, and life.
That’s all y’all.
love
-kev
